I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
just tell him i said nine months
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Randomize
