She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Who died my cat blue again?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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