Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
