You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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