Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
we're so committed to being not committed
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
