Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
