I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
