i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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