YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize