You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
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My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
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I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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