Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
