i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize