I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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