at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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