we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
