she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
