so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
