Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
