My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Randomize
