sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
