addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
