Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize