have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
