So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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