white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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