garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I hate all girls vehemently.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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