Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
