Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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