She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I don't deserve a penis
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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