another moral hangover. fuck.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
