I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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