**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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