i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
