I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
