Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
how drunk are you?
Several
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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