Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
