we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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