I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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