This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
