literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize