he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
