I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
