We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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