New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
