shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
