If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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