Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
