i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
