Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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