Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
