I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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